Relationships » What Might Have Been

What Might Have Been

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Thinking too much about the past isn't always good for the soul.

Question from Gerrick:

I am at a time in my life where I'm single. I know I shouldn't worry about the past, but I sometimes think about the good women I didn't spend enough time getting to know. I feel like some of them could have been wife material.

Is it unhealthy to think about such things?

-- Gerrick

The Brothas Response:

Dear Gerrick,

It can be unhealthy if you dwell on it and cause yourself stress.

During the course of our young lives, we may meet one or two women who we think could be, "The One." Whether they were Ms. Right or not doesn't always factor in to why we couldn't make things work. Many times, it has more to do with something we may be lacking.

Men go through growth and maturity processes, and we're not always ready for, "The One." We sometimes meet good women when we're not emotionally or financially prepared, and this usually causes some distress since men are taught to be leaders in our families.

There's nothing wrong with reminiscing and thinking about the past every now and then. But you shouldn't have regrets. All experiences (even missed opportunities) are learning experiences.

Instead of thinking about what could have been, think about where you are now and what you have to offer a quality woman. All of your life experiences have come together and prepared you for the right woman.


The Brothas

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